fae realm ice fire mage

I know ,I am going to be verbally attacked on this, but I have to say it.

the NPC for ice and fire mage has favored items that are almost impossible to get,
but with effort might be able to buy cheese over time. the other choice I need a group.

the items such as eggs and feathers you need a group. I was on a run and 7 Phoenix birds were killed no drops.
I assume there is one feather or egg for those who get it first, instead of one for each members of the group.
frustration is word for this.

I am not in a guild therefore this is impossible to get these items. Before I could grind and get what I need. that was fun. fire mage at this point it is impossible, I will have to go back to sword or try to get ice mage.

if there is something that I am missing, let me know.

For favor, it's easier to get charged mycelium, assuming you can pick it up and possibly grow it. If you can't, you can request it from players and it should be much cheaper than blue cheese.

Phoenixes are properly elites now, so they drop separate items for everyone. When the patch came out they only gave one item for the whole group, but that's not the case anymore, so you don't need to worry about people stealing your loot from them.

However you are correct, in that you must grind on elites to get fire magic drops, which I also agree is a bit unfair. You can solo Phoenixes, but that's probably not only "unintentional" (In that you're not supposed to do it, not that it's supposed to be impossible), but also significantly harder to do as an fire mage. I guess the excuse in this case is that you can always fall back onto buying them, but I don't believe that's good design for a good number of reasons.

Unfair compared to what? I can list several things I found personally more difficult.

OP, you suggest you may be abused, which seems rudely accusatory of a very polite and helpful community.......

I was forced to READ poetry in off hours to be able to level my bard and could not take a Saturday afternoon away from my kids functions to make it to a jam. All you have to do I buy some cheese, ask a friend to make some cheese, or merely go out and kill some elites with a group. I cannot tell you how much I would love if all my in game issues could be solved as easy as yours with a simply forming of a group. So I am a little confused about how needed to make a simple group to farm a simple mob is "unfair"?

It is currently very difficult to favor the Ice/Fire mage trainer, compared to other trainer NPCs. If you can grow Charged Mycellium, it's very easy but reaching that point is hard and will take time. Again, compared to other trainers.

Regarding Fire Magic Research components, the situation is similar to obtaining Guano at some point (when it dropped only deep within Lab), but you can join open groups killing Fire Droaches and Phoenixes for the daily quest from Agrashab. That's two days out of five where killing phoenixes seems very doable to me.

These components are rare, but not overly so. Grouping casually, I got enough for level 75 spells and I don't expect too much trouble getting enough for level 80 when I get there.

This said, I estimate it's 10 times easier to get Ice Magic spells than Fire Magic spells.

My suggestion: farm stomachs and other mats needed for Sirine cheese, and ask someone leveling Cheesemaking to combine for you. I expect they'll be happy getting free XP. Or go to the trouble of maxing Mycology and Mushroom Farming, as it simplifies things enormously, but it's a lot of work. Or farm Pixies for their Antlers. I did it before working on Mycology, it's a long grind but it works: I had enough favor for spells before reaching high Mycology for the mushrooms.

I don't think the unlocking and leveling of skills is meant to be done overnight. I realize some players of means can, but it is not the norm.
Have patience and try not to get frustrated.
Reach out in game, I will help you kill phoenices.

The phoenix feathers are the single most frustrating thing I've dealt with. You can go through hours, only farming half the time, and 50+ phoenices without a single drop, then get two in a row. The drop rate is somewhere in the 5-10% range. I think the experience would benefit from doubling the drop rate of feathers, and doubling the required number. Make them similar to ice hearts for ice magic. One of my least favorite things about FFXI was doing something for 4-5 hours and have nothing to show from it, the game was filled with gambling time sinks, and PG generally isn't like that. There's grinding involved with PG, but you tend to make steady/expected progress when you put forth the effort. Phoenix feathers could be described as a gambling time sink, as I wasted hours with nothing to show.

Just buy the charged mycellium. It's very reasonable now, compared to the first few days.